Happy Halloween!

"Trick or Treat!"

Our lil Incredible Hulk and his jack-o-lantern!


Getting his face painted by the clown at 'Trunk or Treat' hosted by my hubby's work

Using his muscles to play the pop the balloon game

Playing the throw the ball game!

Our little guy wanted to be Spiderman but, when we went to get it, they didn't have one in his size so, then he saw the Incredible Hulk and wanted that & I think it was soooo much cuter anyway! He loved trick or treating & did a great job! Everyone loved his costume too!

Earlier in the day my husband's work hosted a "Trunk or Treat" and J had a blast! There was a clown doing face painting, cars to 'trick or treat' at and games to play.... It was a fun and safe activity for the kids!


I really enjoyed Halloween this year being able to share it with J and see the joy in his face when people 'pretended' to be scared of him.... He would take off his mask and say 'It's just me' to show them he wasn't really scary! Everyone would point to me and tell him to share his candy with his Mommy and I held my breath each time waiting for him to tell them "She's not my Mommy!" but he didn't... He would just say "Thank You" and run down the steps to show me what he got....


I know Nov 9th will be here too soon but, in the mean time I am just living in the moment and enjoying our time together!


Hope everyone has a....


HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Wednesday....

Wednesday started out with a call from the case worker asking how J has been doing, apologize for the confusion on the meeting yesterday and clarifying a few things I had left a message about the day before.... She said she would try to call me around 2:30 pm with an update..... About 3 pm she called to say they are still working on finding a new placement for the kids and he would be with us a little longer and she would keep me updated.... A little before 4pm (I was in an appointment) I missed a call from the agency.... My heart raced as I listened to the voice mail... They needed me to call them back... I called and the supervisor told me they found a placement for him but they couldn't take them until Nov 9th. She said J would stay with us til then. I've got more time with him-- I know what you are thinking... It will be harder to say 'good bye'.... But, I am grateful for more time.... I might regret it later though....

So, we had to do some shopping tonight! Halloween is Saturday and we needed a costume.... I won't tell you what he picked but will post pics Saturday night.... He had a little tantrum in the store but, we made it through it.... and he is sound asleep now.... I think he was just tired.... I am exhausted! Its hard going from a house with no kids to a house with a 4 yr old... But, I am grateful for it!

That's the update for today... A little more time with our lil guy!

Taking things day by day.....

No real decisions were made today at the meeting-- that I didn't get to attend.... The meeting I was 'invited' too...

I called the case worker first thing this morning to see approximately how long the meeting would last so I could let my boss know how long I would be gone... Although I didn't receive a return call form her, I went to the agency anyway. Checked in, and was told to have a seat.... 10-15 mins later I finally see her.... Then she comes over and softly says to me: 'Sorry I didn't return your call..... I was in a meeting all morning then went to lunch.... My supervisor told me this meeting is just for the family today... We really don't know what we are going to do yet..... I am sorry'-- WHAT??? Why couldn't she take 30 seconds to call me so I didn't have to leave work for NOTHING!!! I was upset but, in a lobby full of people just quietly left.... I asked her to call me and let me know how it goes.... She did but, I missed the call... The message said basically that no decision was made at today's meeting... J would need to stay with us tonight and possibly tomorrow night.... They will keep me informed.... I thought they had a plan on Monday now today no plan? Things change day to day.... Now, I have to live my life day by day.... I wish they would just say-- Ok, one week from today he will be moved or something like that so I know something besides being anxious every time the phone rings.... Ugh!

I dropped off/picked up J at before/after school daycare today.... When the daycare provider opened the door when I came to pick him up he was excited to see me... What a feeling that was!

Tonight we went to my in-laws and had pizza with them.... J was a little uncooperative when we first got there but soon warmed up and ate some dinner.... The rest of the night was good....

I love little 4 yr old talk.... How they mix up their words and it sounds so cute! J says the cutest things....

Each night he gets his bath, eats his snack, then it's bed time... We brush his teeth, I read him a book then we say good night.... Tonight as I walked out the door he yelled 'Love you!'..... Oh how he melts my heart!

So, I am taking things day by day.... enjoying the time I have with him.

Monday, Monday....

This morning my hubby and I took J to preschool... We got to see his room and meet his teacher... She is very nice and seems very caring.... When we went to leave, J hugged me tight and for the first time gave me a kiss on the cheek.... I have been very careful to let him decide if what/when he wanted to show 'affection' to us... Then I got to work and the case worker called to see how the weekend went.... She also told me that J will most likely be with us a little while longer but eventually leave..... They want to keep him, his older sister and a younger sibling together (younger sibling isn't removed yet but, I guess they think it may happen soon) so they will be looking for a foster home that can care for them all.... I totally understand but, feel bad because we only have room for 2 children so we can't even have the option...

I tried to be strong but, I have to admit I broke down a few times at work today (thank goodness for having my own office now) thinking about how he is too young to understand that we do care for him, and that he didn't do anything wrong.... it's nobody's fault.... It's just a crazy situation.... There will be a 'team' meeting tomorrow that they would like one of us attend.... I am going to see if I can get off to go.... I just hope I can be strong through it....

My hubby is sooo supportive.... he knows this will be hard for me..... I thought I would be ok when I said yes but, you just see this cute little boy that is lovable and you just forget for a moment that he may leave you...... I don't know if I can go through this again.... But, I am not sure I can give up my dream of being a Mommy....

I hope I can get the strength to get through the meeting tomorrow ok... I will let you know how it goes....

Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers..... They are much appreciated!

2nd full day w/ J!

J looking at some animals at the zoo.
Swinging on the swings!

Climbing like a big boy on the ropes!

Today we took J to the zoo and playground in our town.... It's just a little zoo but, big enough to see some animals... there is a playground right next to it so we let him play there too... He had fun and it was a nice fall day to go... We saw monkeys, alligators and bears-- Oh my!

On the flip side we did have a few trying times today but, we made it through with only 1 time out! I think it was harder on me to make him take the time out then it was on him (doesn't everyone say that??) But for the most part he is a very good & loving boy who seems more attached to me than my hubby....

We will find out tomorrow what his plan is.... I just want to know... I am taking it day buy day at this point....

Well, he is asleep and now it's time for me to go to bed too... First day getting a 4 yr old and myself ready for work/school.... We are both going to drop him off so we can find out some info in case we have him for a bit longer....

Above are some pics from today. Enjoy!

First full day doing foster care.....

J Riding on the wagon after buying pumpkins!
J pulling the wagon to the register to buy his pumpkin- such a big boy!

Picking out his pumpkin after having fun in the maze/play area!

Going in the hay tunnel!

Leading the way through the corn maze!

Today was our first full day with J as foster parents.... The weather called for rain all day so I wasn't quite sure what we would do. We woke up and made pancakes.... I made J's in the shape of Mickey Mouse and he loved it! Then we got ready and since it looked okay out we decided to go to a local farm and get J a pumpkin and they also had a corn maze there for kids too... We got there and they had hay stacks to climb on & through, mazes, games.... so much to do! We did it all! J had so much fun! Then we let him pick out his own 'big' pumpkin and also a smaller one that he can carry too. Then we went to where my sister was working and J got a spider painted on his face.... Then we went back home to watch-- more Sponge Bob! J loves Sponge Bob! We spent the rest of the afternoon at home and this evening my sister came over and helped J carve his pumpkin we bought him.... All in all it was a great day! J told me he likes staying with us and tonight during his bath he even said the 'L' word! He is such a good boy! Don't get me wrong he is a 4 yr old and has to be redirected sometimes but, overall he is good! I am anxious to see what will happen come Monday.... I keep telling myself he may have to leave, but, wouldn't mind if he stayed a bit longer :0) Above are pics from today.... for privacy reasons I won't show his face but, you can see he had a blast!

'The Call'

Today I was on my way home from work and my cell phone rang.... I saw the number and knew it was DSS! I answered not knowing what the result would be.... The resource worker introduced herself and told me she was calling for a possible placement... She told me that a 7 yr old girl and 4 yr old boy were being removed from a relative placement..... She told me all the info they had about both and said she had a placement for the girl but, that home couldn't take both so she wanted to know if we would be willing take the boy 'J'.... it's respite care right now but, will find out next week what the 'plan' will be. He is an adorable little boy. When the worker dropped him off she warned us he can be a handful and we have to be 'stern' with him but, she said he might 'honeymoon' good with us because there are no other children in the home. He arrived about 6:45pm and since then we have watched Sponge Bob, got a bath & PJ's on, ate some cookies and milk and now he is in bed.....

1st night down and so far so good.... Now, we have to figure out how to entertain him for 2 days! It's supposed to rain tomorrow so, we will have to find something inside to do....

So, we got 'the call' we had been waiting for and I am ok knowing this might be just temporary and he might leave in a few days...

I am going to try to get some sleep now! Big day tomorrow entertaining a 4 yr old!

This is me being Patient....

(the picture we used for our home study file w/ DSS)

(The approval letter that came with our license)

(Our license!)

(The envelope our license came in! On my hubby's birthday & I let him open it!)

So, several posts ago I mentioned I am trying to learn how to be more patient and wait for things to happen.... It's still hard.... Yes, we are finally licensed..... But, everyday each time the phone rings I take a deep breath thinking-- This could be the call that will change our lives.... Of course that call hasn't come yet.... No calls from DSS have come yet....

I thought while I am 'waiting' I would post some pics... I have seen/read/followed a few blogs that people 'document' every step of the process and then plan to print it out for their child to have as a keepsake.... Above are pics I took when we got our license in the mail! Sorry about all the white spots but, I didn't want some info to be shown on here for privacy reasons! This was the only way I could think to block it out-- sorry it's a little messy :-)

Hope you enjoyed the pics.... sorry I didn't post them sooner! Hopefully we will get a 'call' soon!