Life is like a.....

Right now I would have to say my life is like a roller coaster... I don't like roller coasters!

We are having our good days and not so good days with J right now. I know it's understandable due to his life being turned upside down (again) 4 weeks ago... Yes, J has been with us 4 weeks 1 day.... Seems just like yesterday that lil guy was walking through our door....

J has been having some major behavior/anger issues in the past 2 weeks.... It has been happening at home as well as school.... Wednesday was a bad day for both..... I don't want to go into too many details but, it was bad! Like the downward of the roller coaster.

Today was a good day! The upward of the roller coaster! My hubby had somethings to do today and so J and I hung out, rented some new videos (Shrek & Shrek 2 were the pick this week) and played outside. Then this evening we went to a 'Winterfest of Lights' in a nearby town. J had a blast riding the 'train' and looking at all the light scenes.... He did very well waiting in the long line (which moved faster than I thought!), got a light up 'sword' and even got to see the big guy himself-- Santa. We got his picture taken and he told Santa that he wanted a remote control car. At the end he got a candy cane and a fill in the blank 'Letter to Santa'.... What happened to the child writing his own letter to Santa without being prompted. Here is how it reads:

Dear Santa,
So far this year I have been:
____ very good all of the time.
____ good most of the time.
____ good a lot of the time
____ well, not very good lately.

I am a lot older this year. Please remember when selecting my gifts I am ___ years and ___ months old.

Here is a list of some of the good things I have done this year:
1
2
3
4
5

Here is what I would like the most for Christmas this year:
1
2
3
4

Thank you, Santa, for reading my letter. I promise to be good the rest of the year.

Love,
your friend
_________________

I was laughing as I read it! I will sit down with J soon and let him 'fill out' his letter to Santa although he wants everything he sees on TV and I don't know how we will narrow it down to just 4 things.... We may have to send an attachment! Also, I don't remember telling Santa how old I was when I wrote my letter... Doesn't he know how old all the kids are if he is watching them to see if they are naughty or nice? And I wonder how many kids are going to actually choose: Well, not very good lately. Everyone knows 'naughty' children get coal and coal is not a good Christmas gift! I will let you know what J answers in his letter.

This roller coaster has spilled into my relationship with my hubby.... for 10 yrs it's only been he & I. It is an adjustment in general to all the sudden have a child-- a 4 yr old child to care for. We are doing ok but, sometimes it gets a little stressful especially when J's behavior isn't the best. I understand how he must feel like his life is topsy turby right now and sometimes that is hard for my hubby. We are talking it out though and getting through it. The plan is they are still considering us 'respite' and are continuing to look for a long term placement for the siblings so we don't know how long J will be with us.

It's hard not to be able to go out too pool league w/ my hubby every week when I can't get my sis to watch him. She is finishing her last semester of college right now and it's a heavy load so I do understand 100% and want her to do her best. I am so proud of her and can't believe in less than a month she will have her degree and I will be there to cheer her on. I also have waited over 4 years to have a child in my life and am willing to stay home and care for him.

Tomorrow we have scheduled J's first visit w/ his sister since he has been staying with us.... I talked to him about it tonight b/c J is a smart boy and I wanted to let him know. We are taking him to her foster home and will get him comfortable then we may run some errands while he stays and plays. He asked me if we would be picking him up and I assured him he would be coming home with us (because he seemed worried) back to our house... He seems excited to see her...

Tomorrow's conversation after his visit will be telling him he gets to visit w/ 2 of his adult family members on Monday afternoon. I am wondering how his behavior will be after that visit. That may be harder on him. We'll see. DSS is picking him up from school and taking him back to the agency for those visits and I will be picking him up. I hope he has a good time and it's not too hard on him. I will let you know how it goes.

Thanksgiving is on Thursday. We are hosting it this year. I am excited for my family that lives away to meet J and also nervous on how he will react to having so many people in our house at once... Several he has never met before. I have planned to make some decorations tomorrow that he can 'show off' that day to help him break the ice with them. I am also going to tell him his room is his space and if he gets over whelmed he can go in his room and no one will 'bother' him.

Ok, I need to get some sleep. He gets up pretty early in the morning! Good night...