Thanksgiving......

J mixing the brownies after assisting me with counting and measuring the ingredients out...

J checking to see if the brownies are ready yet.....

J's adorable Turkey hat he made at school.....

Wearing his Turkey hat and playing @ my in-laws waiting for dinner....

Wow! Thanksgiving again? Sometimes I feel like we celebrate a holiday/birthday and before I can turn around again it's back again! Last year I hosted Thanksgiving.... This year my MIL offered to host.... My sis & Mom and their boyfriends came in town too.... I am thankful for my MIL hosting this year because I have to work tomorrow..... We did some cooking too and I am exhausted after doing those things this morning! We had a nice day....

I decided to make brownies for the non-pie dessert since I am not a pie person.... I decided to use it as a teachable moment for J and asked him if he wanted to help.... We did it *step by step*, he counted eggs, watched me measure the liquids, poured the ingredients in the bowl and helped stir it up... It was fun! He was proud of himself and beamed when I told our family that *he* made the brownies.....

Tonight when we got home my Mom's boyfriend called me to say how impressed he was with J's behavior this year and that my hubby & I have done a remarkable job with him this past year.... It was so nice to hear that because as I have said before being a foster parent [probably a parent in general too] is a thankless job and to have someone take time to point out that WE have made a difference in J's life was so nice..... It's been a tough year but, things are going very well right now and we are really starting to live as a family.....

So, now to what I am thankful for:

I am thankful for my husband-- we have had so many ups & downs in the 11/6 yrs we have been together/married and we are still together and strong.

I am thankful for J-- Seeing the progress he is making and hearing his sweet voice saying things like: 'Mommy, you're the best. You know why? Because you always take care of me!' or 'Mommy! I LOVE YOU!' He melts my heart.

I am thankful for my family-- we might not see each other too often but, they are always in my thoughts.....

I am thankful for my job-- I know there are so many out there without one that even on the *tough* days [which aren't very much but, you have them w/ all jobs!] I am thankful that I have one.

I am thankful for my friends-- I have real life friends, cyber friends, and foster care friends.... each one of them have a different role in my life and some days I don't know if I could make it through without them..... Some of my cyber friends whom I have never met in person are closer to me than my real life friends!

I am thankful for our men & women in the armed forces-- they risk their lives so that we may live the way we want too and many of them aren't with their families today and that is a sacrifice too....

Finally, I am thankful to you-- my blog readers.... I still don't know if I am very good at this but, reading your comments make me feel like what I write makes a difference!

I hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving!

Catching up....

I am still here... Sorry I haven't blogged in a while.... Not much blog worthy going on right now.... Just busy w/ work, school [for J] and appointments.... Things are going really, really well right now... Each day I see J growing closer & closer to my hubby & I. He is really such a sweet boy... We got his school pictures a couple weeks ago & I really wish I could post them because they are A*D*O*R*A*B*L*E! We are gearing up for Thanksgiving. My MIL is hosting it this year so, I get to relax a bit this year....

Other than that, J & I attended the Adoption Day Celebration our local DSS hosted yesterday. It was nice to hear the inspiring stories of those who have already adopted. I hope that next year we will be one of the celebrated! J's sister's former foster parents were there and have just this week finalized the adoption of their infant.

We are looking forward to celebrating another Christmas w/ J in our lives too... He is already talking about the main thing Santa is going to bring him..... So, I think Santa needs to get on it so that he won't be disappointed.... This is all he talks about: http://www.walmart.com/ip/Hot-Wheels-Criss-Cross-Crash-Track-Set/14689690 even sings the song all the time... So, we need to get it so we are not scrambling at the last minute.... It's going to be fun again shopping and preparing for him! I can't wait! I am going to decorate again this year w/ J while DH is out hunting.... I think it will be J & I 's tradition to decorate together the weekend after Thanksgiving!

Our 2nd Halloween together......

J's 3rd costume of the weekend! Dark Knight Batman!

The Jack-o-lantern J designed all by himself [but, I carved it and I am not a good carver!]

Trick or Treat!

Handing out candy after he was done his trick or treating!

Today was our 2nd Halloween with J in our home.... Wow! Now instead of all firsts we are starting our seconds with him! As I stated in an earlier post the *original* costume of Spiderman ended up being a little snug on him so, we went and got a new one and I think it's just as cute as the other one! He loves to dress up as his super heroes so, they will get much use I know so, I didn't mind! He got tired out easily [probably doesn't help that our neighborhood doesn't have a lot of participation so, you have to walk several houses to get one or two that have their light on....] So, when he was done we went home where he helped give out the treats! Such a big boy!

Hope everyone had a very HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Itsy Bitchy Spider & YMCA Halloween Party!

Today was J's school's *costume event*.... His school encourages his age group to wear a *homemade* nursery rhyme/storybook character costume. They do a parade around the school, Trick or Treat in the elementary school & wave to cars passing by from the front lawn... I am not a crafty person and talked to one of the teachers at the school [who is a friend of mine too from when I worked at this same daycare/school 9 yrs ago] and she suggested making an 'Itsy Bitsy Spider' costume... I looked up the directions and it seemed easy enough... So, we talked to J about it and decided to do it..... Yesterday when I picked him up J's teacher told me he told someone he was going to be the 'Itsy Bitchy Spider' by mistake-- Oops! We practiced and now he can say it right... But, it is a cute story to tell! He was a cute little Itsy Bitchy-- I mean Bitsy Spider if I do say so myself!

Ready for the YMCA Halloween party!


He loved Pumpkin Bowling!

He also loved the bouncy and sliding down the slide!

Craft time w/ Aunt Kerri!

Tonight we went to the YMCA Halloween party.... It was fun w/ several activities for the kids to do and lots of treats to take home! My sister was in town so she came with us and got to spend time with J. She moved away to go to Graduate school and although she is only 2 1/2 hrs away we haven't been able to go up and see her yet but, she has been back a couple times to visit...

When I bought J's costume 3 weeks ago, it fit perfect but, now, it was a little small on him... But, he still wanted to wear it... It got ripped during tonight's festivities and I am not sure if it's fixable so, I went out tonight to get him another one... Something different but, I will keep it a surprise until tomorrow or Halloween....

*****Ps. This is my 100th post! Wow! It's been a little over 2 yrs since I started this and finally got to 100! Thanks for following my story!******

A *change in plans*....

We went back to court today and I was super nervous that something was going to go wrong like last week.... Court proceeded and all the lawyers questioned our caseworker making their arguments.... For a few minutes I thought BM's lawyer was going to get more time but, in the end the judge granted a *change in plan* for all 3 children. It's still a long process to get through but, within the next 30 days a TPR petition will be filed. Then 30-60 days after that, a TPR hearing will be done. If TPR is granted then we go back to court in April when DSS has guardianship of the children and then adoptions can be set..... So, still looks like 6 mos or more before any finalization will happen but, it's another step up from where we were a week ago!

My emotions ran high today as I had to hold my self together when the caseworker stated she received a message from BM after last weeks court date basically sounding like she is giving up.... My heart really went out to her because I think she finally realizes it's best for the children... Maybe now she can concentrate on the newborn who she still has in her care.... I hope for her sake she does! Then I was filled with pride as the caseworker spoke about J and how well he is doing in our home because of us and how we are doing everything possible to help him.... Sometimes being a foster parent is a hard and thankless job but, to hear someone speak of you in that setting in front of all those important people-- it really makes you feel good! Finally I was filled with relief. Relief that this day actually came and now we have a new goal in our sights... Real relief will come when things are finalized but, for now I can relax and enjoy a bit more!

My hubby & I went to get J from school together and then we went out to dinner. J doesn't know what is going on right now but, for my hubby & I it was our *secret* little celebration dinner....

I know that the process is long and that anything can still happen but, we took another step in our lives today... even if for now it was a *baby step* in the end, it's an important step!

Making more Autumn memories.....

"How big am I this year?"

Picking the *biggest* pumpkin!

Hitching a ride w/ our pumpkins!

Last year the day after J was placed with us, we took him to a local farm to do the play area/mazes and pick pumpkins.... We didn't know how long he would be with us but, I wanted him to have some fun memories of us.... I wanted to take him back to the same farm this year-- exactly a year since the last trip... And for as long as he is with us, I will make it our annual tradition.... He remembered it when we pulled up and seemed happy to be coming back.... We did the mazes, climbed on hay stacks, and other play area activities.... Then we each picked our pumpkin... Of course J had to pick the *biggest* pumpkin! It was a nice time... I took a pic of him by the measuring thing again and want to compare them to see how much he has grown.... I still can't believe it's been a year....

We go back to court this Wednesday and I am hoping for more this time than a postponement! 3 more days.....

1 year......

A year ago tonight J came into our home, lives and heart.... At the beginning of the day we were a childless couple and by the evening we were instant [foster] parents to a 4 1/2 yr old boy.

I remember that evening like it was yesterday.... I was driving home from work and my cell phone rang. The number was the DSS main number.... My stomach went crazy! We were done our licensing so, why would they be calling ME on a Friday @ 4:10pm? I had just turned onto our street when it rang and answered. It was the resource worker supervisor. After giving me the info and asking a few questions I called my hubby.... We quickly chatted/decided that sure we could keep him for the weekend..... We had a few things to prepare around the house and I got to work immediately [making the bed w/ fresh sheets, etc...]. My hubby got home and we anxiously waited. We weren't sure what time they would be here.... A little before 7pm the caseworker called. She was on our street. I went outside to wait for them. When they pulled up a shy, adorable little boy came out. The caseworker introduced me to him and we went into the house to give him the tour. She gave us some more info about him and a car seat then left. We were on our own. I remember he came with just a few items of clothes and 2 little toys... Now if you look in his room you would never believe that to be true! My hubby had to run out that night while I got J settled in with a bath and snack to get a tooth brush, juice and cereal.... It was an exciting night. I don't even think my hubby & I ate dinner that night we were so nervous.... What a difference a year makes!

We have been through a whole year of firsts-- first holiday's, birthdays, anniversaries, ups & downs.... It's amazing that sometimes it seems like J has been here just a few weeks and others it seems like he has *always* been here....

We didn't make a *big deal* about today because I was afraid it might make J sad and miss his *real* family [his words] even more than I know he does. We had a good day though... We hung out in our PJ's this morning and then had a lazy afternoon at home... My hubby made us our favorite dinner tonight Steak, hand cut FF & steamed shrimp.... It was just a *family relax day* @ our house... We are planning to take J to the pumpkin patch we took him to a year ago tomorrow.... I want to take pics and compare them from last yr to this year... If he stays I want to make it our little family tradition since it was the first place we took him!

I don't know exactly what the next year holds for us but, for now J is our little boy and we love him very much..... My life will never be the same no matter what happens to our little family in the future.... And my heart melts whenever J asks: "Do you love me?" "Do you ALWAYS love me?" or "You are the BEST Mommy!"


I love you Little Monkey! I am so glad you came into my life!